


Memories of Never

by Valaena_the_Historyteller1



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:33:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28083231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valaena_the_Historyteller1/pseuds/Valaena_the_Historyteller1
Summary: Since the apocalipse, Crowley started to see memories he didn´t know he had in his dreams. Everything related to one person of his past he would prefer to forget. Aziraphale, for his part, after experiencing a couple of night terror on his demon´s part, is reminded of a crazy theory only one angel was supposed to believe in. Could it be? It´s improbable, but if it´s...In Hell, Beelzebub confronts an old coworker who might be hidding a dangerous secret. Might Heaven an Hell ever be the same when this comes to light?
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

Crawly….

Crawly…

Your name is no longer… my creature, you shall bear the name Crawly from now on. Say it!! Say your name!! Say it for your master!!

Writhe for me, little thing. Bleed, BLEED!!!

My little snake, such beautiful eyes. Are you happy now that they changed? Are you happy now that you know?

He hated you so much, so much. It was all thanks to him that I could do this to you. Do you hate him too now that you have tasted pain?

I´m going to miss our dates so much, Crawly, now that they are coming to an end…

“Crowley, wake up!!!” Aziraphale yelled, waking his demon up immediately. The redhead shot up, shaken by his dream. A dream he wasn´t supposed to have, as he hasn´t willed any. If he had, he would have his angel in it. The Principality immediately seemed to notice that as well. “Oh, dear boy, what is it?”

“I don´t know” Crowley answered, hugging his knee. “Since… since the Armagedon´t I have been having those crazy dreams… that´s why I asked you to stay tonight with me, angel… I… I´m sorry for that. I know we don´t need to sleep, but… I wanted to…”

“Don´t worry, dear boy, I would do anything for you” the angel continued, caressing his back in a soothing way. “Why didn´t you say so before, my friend? I would have come sooner.”

“Didn´t want to bother you, not after all that shit Heaven put you through”

“Hell was almost as bad, I know, I was there” the blond said. “Hey, how about we ditch sleep for tonight and drink some wine? It always makes you feel better.”

“Sounds good” he answered, trying to make sense of all he had just heard. Was that even real? For all he knew, they could be auditory hallucinations, but… for some reason he didn´t believe so. Because… because it was the voice of his first master in Hell. The Hell Prince Asmodeus, not the most powerful but the cruellest. He was…

Crowley remembered his first day in Hell, who was also the first one in his memories. He knew vague things, like that he was a Fallen, that he asked too many questions and some other minor things. His personal life, what he liked, who he was, everything important was gone, but… for some reason he didn´t care. He was a Fallen, it didn´t matter. Didn´t matter at all. The Devil then named most of the demons, but the Princes kept the pleasure of naming some of their own hosts. Asmodeus gave him his first name, Crawly. He didn´t like it, it made his skin crawl. He also never got his eyes away from him. It was horrible, being his favourite toy…

Luckily it was over when he was surprisingly assigned the Garden Duty. He got up there, caused some trouble, meet an angel and… BINGO! No more Asmodeus. The snake was now working under Lucifer´s right hand, Beelzebub, who handled all tempters. The Cruel One obviously threw a fit, but not even him would go against Lucifer´s decisions. So he got relocated to his favourite place, earth, and began to work with humanity. He also changed his name… Asmodeus didn´t like it a bit. The snake didn´t care. He was free for the first time since putting a feather in Hell. He had his angel and everything was alright.

“Better, dear?” asked Aziraphale after they drowned the first bottle. 

“A little bit, yessss” the snake answered, still trying to get the nightmare out of his mind. The clinging of chains that accompanied the words… it didn´t let it disappear. “Wisssssh to able to forget about thisssssss.”

“What is it?” the Principality let his cup rest on the table. “You know you can talk about anything with me, Crowley. I´m your friend.”

“I don´t want to burden you with anything…”

“It´s not a burden, my dear” he moved and placed a hand on his shoulder. “I have gone to Hell and back for you, my friend, you shouldn´t fear revealing anything about yourself to me. I will always be by your side.”

“It´s… it´s just that it´s painful to remember” the serpent finally admitted it. “I… I already told you I don´t remember anything about when I was angel apart from the basics, but… lately, I have had some dreams that… are perturbing and… I believe they are from when I first arrived in Hell, but the memoriesss don´t fit.”

“And you believe it was angel you in Hell?”

“Yesssss, No… I don´t know!!” he finally screamed, holding his head. “What the heaven isssss happening to me? That bastard Asmodeus enjoyed toying with me a lot, so it´ssss not unbelievable that he appeared in my nightmaressss, but I don´t remember him ever chaining me or cutting me…”

“You think he might have toyed with your memories?”

“Yessss… no… aggg, thissss isssss confusssing, angel” Crowley admitted, passing a hand through his red locks. “I only know that he did sssssomething to me that I can´t remember. And after the Armageddon´t, when Adam restored everything, that started to come fort again. In the form of obnoxious dreamsss I don´t want!!”

“You believe Adam did that then? Should we talk to him?”

“No, I don´t believe he did it consciously” he bit his lip. “Maybe he just… unburied some issues I already had with my former master.” He sighed. “I shouldn´t put so much attention to them, they are probably not even real.”

“Crowley… are you sure they aren´t?” the angel was suddenly very serious, something strange in him. The serpent looked at him for a moment before putting an effort to recover all his memories from his time with Asmodeus. Nothing at all. No cell, or chains, or anything. When he finished he was shivering, but sure. “My dear…”

“I´m sure”

“Really?” the Principality pressed more. “You mentioned angel you before, I doubt that was a coincidence. Maybe subconscious, but not a coincidence. Are you sure it didn´t happened when you were… still him?”

“How could that be?” Crowley´s eyes widened. “There was no angel in Hell in the First Days after the Fall!!” he yelled, more to assure himself than his friend. “Look, I know what Asmodeus would do to any angel that had the misfortune to fall into his hands, but there was no way angel me was…”

“Crowley… did I ever told you about my old friend Hamaliel?” Aziraphale started, calmingly. The demon tried to follow the conversation. Why was he talking about this angel now? “She is a high ranking Virtue, but had the habit of spending time with us lower echelons back in Heaven.”

“So what?” 

“She made… some strange questions. About what we remembered about the war and… and some angels we were sure never existed” the blond swallowed hard. What he was about to tell his demon was sensitive material, just theoretical (for one angel that everyone deemed crazy) and probably madness, but if it was true… Crowley deserved to know. “She had a theory that no one believed about… prisoners of war.”

“Prisoners of War? You mean from the First War in Heaven?” he frowned, trying to remember it. But then again, the pain of the Fall got in the way. “I know that many angels died and archangel Raphael disappear for centuries, only to reappear to chain Asmodeus in Egypt millennia later. I loved the guy for that.”

“Yes, but… Hamaliel thought… that Raphael was not the only one to banish in thin air. He was the only one to be remembered, but not the only to disappear.”

“That´s ridiculous, Heaven would have known, have some archives…”

“And that´s why no one believed her, but… I think that when Adam restored reality, he might have also… accidentally restored your memories from your last days as an angel… as a prisoner of war angel in Hell.”

“Aja, well… I think it´s time to sober up, angel, because you are clearly drunk” the redhead shook his head. “For you to believe such nonsenses…”

“But it would make sense, no?” Aziraphale continued in the same track. “You know Asmodeus didn´t do anything to you while you were a demon, at least not your nightmares, but he could have done it to you while you were still an angel and you wouldn´t remember it because the Fall erased your memories.”

“Well, technically yes, but…” the serpent thought about it. It was insane, he would remember something like that done to him, even if he was an angel at the time. He should… know if something as cruel was done to him. “This is insane, it couldn´t have been that way. I would remember…”

“Asmodeus has messed with other memories before, you told me yourself” the Principality continued. “Besides, there is something that has been nagging at me since we met. I´m not complaining, my dear, but you have never been like other demons. You are so nice and considerate…”

“Take that back”

“I´m sorry, Crowley, but I have to speak my mind” the angel continued. “You might have invented the original sin and become a thorn on Heaven´s side, but… you have never been evil. Annoying and mischievous, yes, but outright evil?”

“Take that back right now”

“I´m sorry if that offended you, Crowley, but it´s the truth.” Aziraphale continued, finally speaking with the truth. “You even saved those children from drowning when the Arch sailed, no other demon would have done that.”

They looked at each other without knowing what to say for a few minutes. Crowley wanted to refute him, to say that he was as evil as any demon, that he was the evillest, but… now that he thought about it, no other demon would have considered saving those children. Not even to ruin God´s plan. Or making friends with an angel, now that he was really considering it. No other demon would do it.

“Let´s just say for a second that Hamaliel was right and I was one of those prisoners of war. Shouldn´t heaven know of me or have some archive about me?” the demon finally said. “Or at least the angel I was?”

“Not if someone messed with the memories on the other side too. Which is actually making me shudder.” He drank a little bit more of wine to calm down. “Michael should be the only one to have backchannels…”

“Michael has never been the only one, I know. Beelzebub had a way to contact Gabriel… or at least I think so” the snake looked at his cup. “Anyway, even if that´s true and someone of high enough rank messed with the hosts, it still didn´t explain it. How would they have made those prisoners Fall if they were innocent?”

“By torture”

“What?”

“By torture” Aziraphale repeated. “Being tortured constantly for centuries would have made them question God or even curse her name, so they fall too. Or maybe it was a mixture of torture and something else…”

“Dammit, doesn´t make sense at all”

“Or it makes sense and you just don´t want to believe it” his angel put a hand on his shoulder. “Because being a demon it´s the only thing you know. If it results that you were one of this prisoners of war…”

“It wouldn´t matter, I´m still fallen” the serpent said. “And if you are right, then I did something far worse than question God while Asmodeus tortured me. I cursed her name, Aziraphale, there is no other way to see it.”

“Crowley…”

“Aziraphale, that angel is gone, the HOW couldn´t change that fact” he sighed. “But, you know, it wouldn´t matter. Meeting you is the best thing that happened to me in all my existence, I wouldn´t change it for the world. Or the HOW” he chuckled. “You are the best thing in my life, angel.”

“But, Crowley…”

“That angel is gone, Aziraphale, let it go” he drank more wine. “Even if Hamaliel is right and I was one of those prisoners of war, it wouldn´t change things. I´m a demon and proud of it, there is no other way to put it”

“Dear heart…”

“Besides, I´m sure I was a dick as an angel. That´s why no one remembers me in the first place.”

“I…” the Principality didn´t know what else to say. He wanted to argue more, but… Crowley seemed happy like that, so it could get to tomorrow. Or next week. Mentally reminding himself to talk to Hamaliel later, he settled himself to spend the night with Crowley. It was so nice to be able to do it…

-In another place-

“I know you are here, Kobal” Hastur said as he entered a cabin in the middle of nowhere. He had been stalking this place for a while, only to make sure he was on the right track, but now that he was positive… “Your master has been so furious when he heard that you abandoned your place. A especial punishment is surely waiting for you in Hell.”

“I´m not receiving any”

“The Cruel One is not know for his forgiveness, you should know that by now” the Duke of Hell said, a sadistic expression on his face. 

“You misunderstood” the celestial got out of the darkness that cloaked him to face the intruder. “I´m not going to receive a punishment because I´m not returning to Hell” he got into position. “Now be gone before I send you away.”

“You? A simple demon against a Duke of Hell? A trash against a deity?! You must surely be mad!!”

“Not mad, just… changed” he opened his wings, making the demon´s eyes went wide. They were white. And the aura around him was… was sacred. 

“How… what… Kobal, how did you…”

“Call me Kokabiel” he said before smiting the Duke back to Hell. After doing that, he let himself fall to the ground, breathing hardly. Hastur knew. Dammit, dammit, dammit, Hastur fucking knew!! There was no way in Heaven or Hell this wasn´t going to be gossiped around the bloody Pit until everybody knew. Which, in turn, meant that Asmodeus and his minions would know. He shuddered just by thinking about that. 

“Hello, Kokabiel, how have you been?” asked Hamaliel, arriving in that moment. “I sensed a smiting near and decided to investigate. Never guessed it was you.”

“Go away”

“Don´t be like that” the Virtue put her hand on his shoulder, offering then a bottle of holy water for him to drink. “Last time you said you needed time. I have given you time, but… why haven´t you returned to Heaven since then? You would surely be safer there.”

“A right outcast, you mean” he rolled his eyes. “I have been a demon for millennia before you came and undo whatever Asmodeus did to me. I don´t… don´t know how to be an angel anymore. If I were to present myself at Heaven as I am now, I would be rejected by them without a second thought.”

“You were a prisoner”

“And a demon. That you changed that doesn´t change the past” he breathed in and out. “Anyway, we shouldn´t be talking about this while the forces of Hell are preparing to take me. I won´t return to Heaven, but that doesn´t mean that I want to go back to Hell.”

“As you wish” Hamaliel said, sighing. It was no fair, she finally had a living proof that her theory was correct and she couldn´t go brag in the Archangel´s faces because her achievement didn´t want to come with her. “Are you sure you don’t want to come with me? I can help you accommodate if you want.”

“No, it´s fine like this. I… have learned to value Earth as a home and want to remain here for now.” He began to pack the scares things that he had in his cabin. “ I have food, TV, radio… What else could you want?”

“Isn´t there something you miss about Heaven?”

“With all those stuck up jerks? Not at all.”

-In Hell-

“Why are you here so soon, Hastur?” Beelzebub asked his subordinate, as he entered his office with the distinctive smell of a smiting clinging to him. “Thought you have a traitor to bring us. One that isn´t immune to holy water.”

“Things went… a little strange there”

“Did an angel intervened? Why wasn´t Kobal smitted too?”

“Because he was the angel” the pen that has been on the Prince of Hell´s hand snapped in two when he heard those words. Kobal recovered his grace? Kobal was an angel again? That was impossible!! “He said his name was Kokabiel now.”

“Kokabiel? I don´t remember a Kokabiel” he grabbed his head, trying to find something. But nothing came to mind. He rose himself from the desk, ready to take the matters to hand. He excited his office, marching down to the jail section where the torturers worked. “I need to talk to Asmodeus right now about his creatures.”

“Prince Beelzebub, Prince Asmodeus is dangerous…”

“Not for me” the Prince entered the principal office. “Asmodeus!! You have a lot to explain.”

“Chill out, Beelzebub, because I think you are mistaken. It was your creature that failed in the task of bringing back mine, not backwards…” a beautiful demon with long, orange hair and eyes of blood said while he cleaned his bloodstained nails.

“Kobal is an angel again” the other prince informed. “And I´m inclined to think that you know why.”

Asmodeus refused to show fear in the face of discovery, as it could be his ruin. Dammit, it was supposed to be impossible, but… but… he calmed down internally, giving Beelzebub his best apathetic smile. 

“Really? You must tell me, dear.” He was going to have to keep an eye on his creatures from now on. ALL of his dear creatures.


	2. Chapter 2

“Aziraphale, great to see you!! What are you doing here in Heaven? Thought you didn´t work for the office anymore?” Hamaliel said, ever the cheerful little Virtue. Or big Virtue, because she was quite high in the power scheme.

“Great to see you, Hamaliel” the Principality answered, gazing nervously around himself. He shouldn´t be here, he wasn´t welcomed in Heaven anymore, despite being an angel, but… he needed to contact his old friend. In light of the resent events, she might be the only one with the ability to understand what was happening to Crowley… and help him. “Have you been making progress with that investigation of yours?”

“Ahhh, Aziraphale, between all the angels of Heaven, you were the last one I thought would come to mock me for believing my own foolish investigation.”

“I´m not” the blond said, looking around with concern. “Would you mind if we discuss this in a more… private environment? I won´t like Gabriel to find me here. Michael either. Or hear about this, but I really need to talk to you” the virtue stared at him for a moment, before lifting herself from his seat. “Would you come to earth with me?”

“Yes, if it´s that urgent” they both jumped down the personal portal high ranking angels had in their rooms. Once in Soho, the Principality signalled a place near his bookshop. “Old friend, why…”

“I know a great coffee down the streets, why don´t you accompany me there? I can introduce you to the wonders of English gastronomy too, if you feel tempted.”

“Now you are tempting me, Aziraphale? Be careful, or you might find yourself making company to your slithery friend among the Fallen.”

“That´s… exactly what I wanted to talk to you about” the other angel said, gaining Hamaliel´s interest. “Not here, come” the man grabbed her and guide her to the café. “Hypothetically speaking, how would one difference a True Rebel Fallen from one of this prisoners of war turned demons?”

“No one has been so interested in my investigation before. Why the curiosity?” she asked as they sat down in the Principality´s favourite table. One he only used to share with Crowley… wonder what he was doing now. “And don´t tell me it´s because of simple curiosity, because I know it´s not. Something happened.”

“What do you know about… Crowley?”

“The demon you betrayed Heaven with? No, nothing more than…” suddenly Hamaliel seemed to catch up with him in that moment. “You believe that he was a war prisoner? On what are you basing this conclusions? Did you know since the beginning?”

“Well, I didn´t know until the Apocawoops…”

The next hour, Aziraphale explained how his demon was different from other Fallen. That he was always more mischievous than truly evil, that he saved lives during the Flood and many other things that a demon shouldn´t have done. How they came up with the Agreement, which later would become a friendship and finally more. But, when the World was remade, the demon started having some strange uncontrollable dreams of torture and gore, which made the Principality worry. It was that point when Crowley finally talked, made his confusion and pain know when he realised… he realised that the Virtue was right.

Hamaliel, for her part, was confused and more than a bit angry. Millennia trying to track down prisoners of war, something that even her had begun to doubt existed in the first place before she accidentally met Kokabiel, her only proof that she was right… and Aziraphale just walked in on one? And becomes friends? For six thousand years? So unfair!! Well, if it was really like that. The demon could simply be an eccentric one. Anyway, she didn´t lose anything to try. She just must be really careful.

“Hamaliel? Hamaliel, are you alright?”

“Yes, yes, I´m okay. I was just thinking about your… predicament” the virtue bit one finger. “Do you want me to revert the Fall?”

“It´s that possible?” the Principality looked beyond surprised. Was it really possible for a Virtue to revert such a spiritual process like a Falling?

“Well, were he a True Fallen, then no, he will stay a demon. But a prisoner of war turned demon because of torture and poison… it can be done.”

“Have you ever done this before?”

“Once” she answered, trying to ignore completely the images in her mind about the thousands of demons she had sacrificed to holy water searching for those lost from memories. Kobal was the only one to survive a trial and error procedure to become an angel again… which he was not really happy for. “It´s experimental still…”

“Experimental?”

“Kind of painful?” a lot of painful, according to her guinea pig. Anyway, she won´t lose a chance to experiment again, to standardize the procedure. Only now she was going to have to be very careful. Aziraphale would kill her if she harmed his demon and was much a better warrior than her, so… careful. “The first thing we have to do is determine if he is really a war prisoner demon.”

“And how do we do that?”

“Well… we have to feed him holy water”

“Are you MAD?!”

“Listen, if he is really one of them, he won´t have a problem consuming it. The worst that can happen is a bit of a nasty bleeding...”

“It would DESTROY HIM?!”

“No if we dilute the holy solution. Relax, I don´t want to kill your friend” the virtue got up, finishing her coffee quickly. She was so enthusiastic that she could barely contain herself. Another chance to experiment in a healing method for demons, what a delight. She couldn´t wait… she was practically on her toes as the Principality served her tea in the bookshop, as they waited for Crowley.

“Angel!! I have brought scones, we can serve them with tea and… Aziraphale, are you alright?” the Serpent asked, getting in guard as soon as he sensed a second angelic presence on their warded space. 

“Yes, dear, I am” the demon walked towards the two heavenly creatures and found a strange looking angel sitting down with his own. She was also seeing him with interest, as if he was a specimen of some sort. “Crowley? I think I already mentioned Hamaliel. The one with the theory about the…”

“War Prisoners, yes, you mentioned her” the redhead sat down near his friend, grabbing one of the cups. The weird being grabbed her own cup, but didn´t make any move. She stayed frozen, watching him take the tea to his lips… until someone suddenly flied in, rudely knocking the thing from his hands. “What… Kobal?”

“Do you have no shame, Hamaliel?” the former demon looked furiously at the virtue, who just shrugged. Kokabiel was so angry that his eyes seemed like daggers. “What is your problem?! Experimenting with demons when no one asked you to!! Turning me back when I never asked for it!! And now you want to do the same to another person, regarding of their personal feelings…”

“Aziraphale asked me to do it, don´t blame me”

“Even so…”

“What?” Crowley interrupted the conversation, looking towards his angel. This was nervous, refusing to see him to the face. The snake groaned, knowing it was true. “Why, angel? We talked about this, I´m fine as I am.”

“I… didn´t do it to hurt you. I only… am worried about those nightmares you were having and wanted to know for sure if they were just dreams or memories buried inside your mind” the blond held his hands. “I can´t stand the thought of someone hurting you, believe me, and the thought that you stopped being an angel because of what that bastard Asmodeus did…”

“That angel is gone, Aziraphale, one way or another. Nothing is going to bring him back” the redhead stared at the cups wearingly. “What did you put inside that tea?”

“Holy water” Hamaliel answered.

“WHAT?! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!”

“No, I would never let her” the Principality got in the middle. “It´s just a few drops in the kettle. Even a normal demon can stand that… with minor burns, that´s it. It was because of that that Hamaliel is here. I wanted a Virtue to heal your injuries in case something is wrong.”

“Also to document the result of the test.”

“A test you shouldn´t have done without the express consent of the person you are making it in, not of his partner” Kobal crossed his arms. It was a good thing that he was watching Hamaliel´s movements on earth, he wouldn´t want another special demon to land on her hands like himself.

“You know what” Crowley said after a few moments of silence, grabbing Hamaliel´s unfinished cup. “I´m content with what I am, but if Aziraphale wants to get out of doubts, I will do it. And when nothing happens, we will be able to leave it at rest” he took the cup to his lips and drank it. It burned a bit on his throat, but nothing unmanageable. A few minutes later “See? No…” dark black drops of a weird ooze started to fall from his nose and staining the mantle. “What?”

“Can I?” the virtue approached with a handkerchief, letting some drops fall into it. The fabric around them turned purple and started bubbling in a nasty, sickly colour before stopping suddenly. “Seems to be some kind of poison to me” she smelled it. “From a Beast from the Pit, probably of the reptilian sort.”

“Why is it coming out of my body? I have never worked with animals ever in my life!! Not even in Hell!!” Crowley yelled, trying to stop the apparent bleeding.

“But it was there before and in a big quantity. Much like in Kokabiel´s body when I first found him” the mentioned angel grunted when mentioned, remembering how painful it was to get rid of that pollution on his body. “At least this confirms Aziraphale´s suspicions, you are indeed a former War Prisoner.”

“I… I am?” he asked himself. A memory suddenly hit him, more clear than ever before. Asmodeus in front of him, sharpening the torture tools he will use in him soon, wanting them to be nice and clean for use. He shuddered at the remembrance, but took a hold of himself. “I… I guess you are right.”

“I always am with medicine. After Raphael, there is no virtue more proficient than me” the angel said smugly. “So, when do you want to start the treatment?”

“Excuse me?”

“The treatment to remove the poison from your spirit!! So you can become an angel again!! It will be a little painful, but…”

“You are insane if you want to go through that Hell. It´s… it´s horrible” Kobal interfered. “Rising is much like Falling, hurts like every part of your spirit burning, like… like you are being turned into something else. Something strange and forgotten… wouldn´t desire it on my worst enemy. Besides, it has no real benefits…”

“Come on, you enjoyed smitting Hastur back to Hell when he tried to drag you there” the healer said with a cocky smile. “That´s a benefit”

“If you put it that way” the other said with a frown. Since that had happened, he had to be continuously on the move, with demons trying to capture him. Not what he imagined for his life. “It´s still too painful for you to…”

“I already said no” Crowley interrupted, firmly. “Look, I´m fine as what I am, there is no need to change anything about me.” The serpent stared at his significant other. “I´m sorry if you wanted otherwise, but…”

“Don´t worry, dear boy, whatever you desire is fine by me” the angel smiled, showing his entire support. The demon smiled at him lovingly.

“There you have, I don´t need…”

“Have you thought this thoroughly?” asked the virtue, suddenly very serious. “If you were to Rise, you will be able to return to Heaven. Aziraphale too. You won´t have to be on contrary sides anymore. Don´t you want that? To return home…”

“First of all, we haven´t been on opposite sides for long time, a couple of centuries at least” the redhead began, his eyes flashing dangerously. “Second, who wants to return to Heaven? That place is awful and the people in it more, Gabriel the most among them. And Third, I have faced master manipulators more than once down there. You really believe you were going to be able to make me change my mind in such a dirty a way?”

“I had to try, Kokabiel and you are the only proof I have that I have been right this whole time…”

“Haven´t return there yet” singed the other.

“And I´m not going to, so you better search for another Guinea Pig” he crossed his arms. “Thank you for your visit and the bitter taste of medicine I definitely didn´t ask for, don´t come back in another time.”

“Well, like I said, I had to try. Good luck with whatever you are going to do next” the virtue lifted herself from her chair. “But if you ever change of opinion, Aziraphale knows where to find me. Keep me informed, old friend!!”   
She extended her wings before disappearing from view. Kobal muttered a short goodbye to the couple and also flew off, to keep an eye on the eccentric angel. Crowley turned to his own, raising an eyebrow behind his glasses.  
“So… did you want me to become an angel again? Because I already told you I was fine the way I am.”

“No, I… only wanted to get out of doubts… and help you with your nightmares” confessed the Principality, looking to the ground. “It hurts me to see you so pained at night, dear. It´s… it´s horrible.”

“Oh, angel” they hugged. When they separated, the demon was smiling. “How about we go to the Ritz tonight and then to bed early. I don´t know you, but I can tell this night I´m only going to have sweet dreams…”

-Later-

It was the first time he went to this part of Eden… he liked it. The redhead looked around himself and found himself wearing… white? And his wings were the same colour, a snow white he had forgotten. His hair was still the same colour, but it was now braided with a gold ribbon that seemed to bring out the copper red. For a second he thought the world have stopped in that memory…

But no. The angel he was continued moving down to earth. His delicate feet touched the ground for the first time in his life and the first thing he felt was… auch, pain. For some reason, he had landed on a rosebush. At first, it seemed like a very good place to land, with all the pretty flowers the colour of his hair, but he came to regret it very quickly. Silly him. With a wave of his hand, he healed it and started with his job: visiting each of the green and flowery creations of God and concede them their healing properties. A boring job, yes, but he needed this change of airs. He was getting suffocated of the fighting up there.

Soon he regretted his decision to take this assignment, as a band of angels descended upon him and decided to pick on the new angel at the garden. He ignored them. Or at least try to do that, but… Couldn´t they be more respectful? He knew he was not known down there, but…

“Hey, dears, behave yourselves. Angels don´t pick on one another” Aziraphale suddenly appeared, flapping his immaculate wings. “Let´s be good to everyone, okay?”

“Yes, Principality Aziraphale” the bullies answered and went away. The older angel sighed, giving the redhead a smile. 

“Are you okay?” he asked. Crowley blushed for some reason, completely forgetting about the exact thing this particular ginko was going to do. Was it poisonous or good for blood circulation? Well, for safety´s measures, both. One for the leaves and one for the seeds!! “Sorry for that, it´s not suppose to happen. I guess it comes with them being quite young, a phase if you want to put it that way…”

“It… it doesn´t matter” he babbled. Then wanted to slap himself. Had he never talked with other angel? He should know how to do it!! “Thank you for your help, but… I´m Raguel.” He blurted out, improvising the… something. “I´m sorry, Principality, I…”

“Don´t worry, I´m not as stiff as other superiors” he let it slip. “Call me Aziraphale” they shook hands. “So… you are a virtue.”

“What gave me away?”

“You were blessing the plants with healing properties, it´s a virtue job” he signalled the ginko. “So… I was right?”

“No… well, yes…” Aziraphale was now confused, what was he trying to say. “I´m still training, so I don´t know if I can call myself virtue yet.”

“That´s great!! I´m glad the superiors are giving the youngsters more responsibilities instead of doing the jobs themselves. Tell me, how does the blessing works?”

They ended up talking more than working, which was fine by the redheaded angel. By the time he returned to Heaven, he was smiling like a loon. And he just couldn´t stop himself!! He was on love!! Aziraphale was so great and charming and… he passed before a mirror by accident. It made his smile evaporate. He felt… bad… for something… he couldn´t explain… LIAR… he touched it, just on his cheek´s reflection and his body emitted light… changing…

Crowley opened his eyes that morning, earlier than usual. It was not the whole sweet dream he had promised Aziraphale, but it didn´t stop being sweet. Sweeter than all the others. Besides, he now knew that he had met Aziraphale before, which gave their history a whole new meaning. One that talks about love bringing them together… eh, first love. Puppy love? Aggg, he hated puppies.

He also could put a name to the face now. Which made him wonder if thing could have been the same of he hadn´t Fallen. Or been captured, as he now knew. Would Aziraphale have liked Raguel as much as he liked Crowley? Or found him an obnoxious little pest that was too shy for his taste? He didn´t know and he didn´t really want to ask. He was afraid of the answer. Besides, there was no way the Principality remembered that, no? No? NO?!

“Crowley, is something the matter, dear?” Aziraphale asked, worried. He had slept all night like before, without any nightmare, but… he usually wasn´t awake at such an early hour. “Did you have another nightmare?”

“No, I… hum, angel, did you remember meeting me before?”

“What? No, I…” the blond thought hard, Crowley approached, grabbing him by the arm. “What have you remembered, Crowley? Have we met before the garden?”

“Yes, we did. I was blessing some plants back then and you…” the phone ringed then. “I will answer, you stay here. There are still scones for breakfast if you want one” he ran to the machine, pissed. “Whoever is calling here, we are a little bit busy now…”

“Oh, just the demon I was trying to find. Crowley” the snake froze in his place. This voice was… it was… Hastur. He was about to hang in a panic before worms could enter the library when he started talking again. “Don´t worry, I won´t go there. I just want to give you a message.”

“What message?” he asked, wearily.

“Well, Hell still wants you to pay for your transgression. And the failed Apocalypse. I also want you to pay for the death of Ligur, but that´s personal… so I also attacked you personally” the laughed wickedly. “Do you remember the obnoxious little brat you used to babysit? The one that said I reeked of poop?”

“If you put a hand on Warlock, I will…”

“Ja, the snake began hissing so soon? Enjoy the rest of his day, it will be the last”

“What have you done?!”

“Let´s just say he is in for a Hell of a ride” the communication was cut. Crowley was about to yell again when he heard Aziraphale. 

“CROWLEY!!” he ran to the kitchen, where his angel was staring in horror at the TV he had recently bought. It was on the news… where they said that the American Ambassador and his family had suffered a terrible accident. He covered his mouth with a hand. The next time he see Hastur he was going to…

“We don´t have time, let´s go to his side, angel!!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The history continues!!! Hope you have liked this one so far.


	3. Chapter 3

“I can´t believe it. Warlock” Crowley was muttering as he walked into the hospital that now held his godson and his supposed parents. He didn´t care about self centered Harriet and even more egomaniac Thaddeus, but the little one… the kid had too much life ahead of him. He couldn´t die there.

“Calm down, dear” Aziraphale said, despite being the one that was more in panic. He was an angel, yes, and his speciality were miracles, but… he was no virtue. He could cure fractures, twisted ankles, minor to moderate injuries, but something like braindeath and mayor needed formal education at healing of the kind only a certified healer would have.

“I won´t calm down, this isssssssss seriousssssss” the snake began hissing because of the stress he was enduring. “Hassssstur would only brag if he hasssssssss done something horrible. Sssssssssssssomething really horrible.”

“Crowley, the hissing”

“Can´t ssssssssssssssssstop, it´sssssssssss too much” he nearly bit his tongue with the last one. The Principality kept the retort to himself, as they were nearing the intense care unit. A small miracle kept them from being detected by the humans as they neared the Ambassador and his family´s beds. A doctor and a nurse were near, talking. 

“The parents are critic, but stable and might do a full recovery. Specially the mother, she took the least impact” the medic was speaking, shaking his head. “The boy is the real problem. It need to consult another medic to certificate it, but I´m pretty sure he is braindead.”

“Poor thing” the nurse said, looking at the boy with compassion. “The parents are going to be so sad when they wake up. Do I need to prepare the documents to disconnect him or that would be too insensible?”

“No need, the Ambassador signed a document that entitled the doctors to unplug a member of his family as soon as they are pronounced braindead.” Damn Thaddeus!! “And to use the organs for transplants” the serpent gritted his teeth, feeling the need to bite. That prick, always thinking of his political career first, even for charities. Anyone else would think this was kindness, but this was only a dirty political move. “I will go for doctor Mels now.”

“I will stay here”

Aziraphale opened his mouth to tell something, feeling a little selfish because he wanted to help Warlock more than the children who would receive his organs, but the demon grabbed him before he could utter a sound and dragged him out of UCI. They were directly to a bathroom, stopping only for Crowley to get two glasses of water in a dispenser.

“Is there something you could do?” the redhead answered just as they both were inside of the bathroom. Alone.

“Not against braindead, it needs to be a virtue” the blond put his hands together. “I will call Hamaliel, she will know what to do in such a case.”

“Angel, I know you want to help, but do you remember who is the Messenger of God and by default in charge of all the communication in Heaven?” Aziraphale stopped. “Face it, Angel, you will have to go up there any time you want to see one of your heavenly friends.”

“Then what should we do? I don´t have time to go up there and pick Hamaliel…”

“I have an idea.”

“Crowley, you are wonderful with demonic miracles, but they aren´t exactly of the healing kind… at least not without a price” he sighed. “We need a virtue”

“We have one” the demon said, putting the glass with the least amount of water in his angel´s hands. “Me”

“What…” the snake bit his lips.

“It happened yesterday night. I dreamed without meaning and realised… realised that I was a virtue before I fell. Or was captured, whatever” the redhead shook his head. “Okay, I was in training, but I can do the healing, I swear. In fact, I´m positive I can do it.”

“Dear, I´m sure you are telling the truth, but… you remembered that you used to be a virtue for nearly two hours, you can´t possibly make the healing right now” the Principality tried to calm him down. “Besides, we don´t even know how far you went into your training, this kind of healing could be too much for you.”

“Well, at least I have to try, no? Preferably before that doctor comes back to kill our Warlock” a growling Crowley said. “And there is no time to go up there through the secret paths and call Hamaliel, even if I stop time for a while. Something I haven´t been able to do since the Armaggedidn´t, by the way” he pressed a glass to his hand. “So, please, angel, bless that water and mix it with the other, I will chug it up and we will see what I can do.”

“Dear boy, we don´t even know if…” Aziraphale started, scared.

“I´m willing to take the risk” the demon said with determination. “Now bless the water and mix it, we are going to save Warlock, whatever it takes.”

“Crowley, you said you didn´t want to stop being you. That you didn´t want to become… angel you.”

“I said I was going to take the risk, no? Besides, I think angel me wasn´t so bad after all. He… he liked you a lot from when you worked together in the Garden” the Principality´s eyes went wide. He didn´t remember working together with Crowley, not even before the Fall. “Please, it might be the only way to help Warlock in time.”

“Crowley” the angel sighed before emptying half of his glass into the other. It was still too much in his opinion, but… he knew the other. He won´t accept anything less. “If we are going to do this, we are going to do it in my terms, okay?” his partner nodded. “This amount of holy water, nothing more. I know you can risk your life for Warlock, but I can´t lose you, okay?” this one was immediately accepted. “And whatever you remember while recovering, you have to tell me, yes?”

“Of course”

“Good” he blessed the water and mixed it. 

“Thanks, angel” the demon said before drinking it all in a gulp. He felt a burning in his throat, followed by the urge to gag as his body shook. He turned to the sink before his nose started dripping the same black liquid as the last time. Soon he was also retching that same thing into the white marble. As if called, Aziraphale opened the sink and blessed the water before the black material could reach the drains. It hissed in contact with the holy water and evaporated in swirls of dark miasma.

“Gross” he managed to say before the second round of retching. It was horrible, the sensation of his whole being shaken, turning into something that was hidden, forgotten. The churning didn´t help at all.

But that was not the worst. The worst was the memories that assaulted him, all at a time. During a few seconds, he didn´t know how he was anymore, Raguel or Crowley. Then he heard Aziraphale´s voice calling his name and… managed to gain control of his ragging memories. He had to help Warlock, he needed to remember what he knew about healing. Immediately another round of overbearing memories attacked him. Apparently he got pretty far in the healing school, because he remembered himself giving classes to fledgelings. And older angels. Wait, should an apprentice be doing that? Shouldn´t that be a higher ranking angel´s job? Then why was…

“Crowley!! Are you alright?! I knew this was a bad idea, I´m calling Hamaliel…”

“No” the snake stopped him, taking control of his body. Whatever was happening, he will deal with it later. For now, he had enough knowledge to save Warlock, which was his goal. Controlling his nausea, he walked to the UCI, stopping time as he crossed the door. It was easier than he remembered, as if it was a reflex. “Hello, hellspawn” he said as he arrived to the boy´s bed. “Don´t worry, I´m going to save you”

“Crowley, are you sure…” without even listening to him, the redhead put a hand over the child´s forehead, this starting to glow. The Principality looked his partner work in wonder, not seeing a demon anymore but a virtue at work. He was totally concentrated, at least until the boy opened his eyes. 

“Nanny? Brother?” he asked as time restarted itself. Crowley opened his mouth to answer him, but didn´t have time. The doctors returned in that moment, making the two supernatural beings turn invisible. He felt really guilty at leaving Warlock practically alone, even if the face of the UCI doctor was funny enough to make the boy laugh.

“Braindead my ass” the other doctor mussed as he approached the patient. “Hey, buddy. How are you doing?”

“Did you see Nanny and Brother when you came? They were here!”

“Nanny and Brother? I´m afraid no” the doctor answered, thinking the then comatose boy was dreaming. He started examining the boy, while the other finally snapped and went to disappear the death certificate. “Can you tell me more about them? Maybe we can find them together.”

“But they were here!!”

Aziraphale felt someone pulling on his invisible corporation then. It was Crowley, taking him out of the UCI fast. He was about to ask why they were leaving their boy alone when the demon grabbed something from a table and started retching in it. Soon it was filled with a dark liquid that Aziraphale had to make disappear.

“I´m… I´m not feeling well. It´s like… as if a part of me is fighting against me” he explained, controlling it for a bit. “I don´t… think I can…” the Principality miracle a basin and presented it to his partner, who started expelling the dark thing in it. “Thanks, angel.”

“I don´t think you can drive like that” said Aziraphale, miracling the Bentley away to it´s usual place near Crowley´s house. “And we should go back to my house, where we can find out what is happening to you.”

“Yeah…” seeing the demon in no condition to move at all, the angel miracle them both to the bookshop, where the snake could relax and puke in one of the pots his blond had in the kitchen while Aziraphale tried to think about how to contact Hamaliel with Gabriel interfering with him, but…

“Hello! Is there someone here?!” Kokabiel entered in that moment, which make the other angel thank God. “I know you probably want some privacy, but I was worried and wondered how Crowley is feeling after… what´s happening?!”

“We had to take some drastic measures” Crowley answered between retching.

“No matter” the frantic Principality said, getting in the middle. “Do you know how to contact Hamaliel? I need her to come asap.”

“Why would I know how to…” more repulsing sounds reached his ears and he changed his opinion. “I have her phone number. I will call her right away.”

“Phone number?” asked Aziraphale, surprised that one of the high ups knew what a phone was.

“We needed a way to contact each other in case of emergency and as most angels are downright ignorant about technology, it was the best way” he excused himself to make the call, throwing a last look to Crowley as he went.

A Crowley that wasn´t feeling very good.

A Crowley who was now seeing a disturbing memory flashing in his mind.

He was in a dark place with lots of dusty books, old even for Heaven. Because it was definitely Heaven, he remembered that sensation from the trial. It was also abandoned. He didn´t know what he was searching for, only that he was… searching for something? Yes, and that was for… for… something was wrong. An attack from behind, him falling to the dust covered ground. Was there someone else? Something else? He couldn´t see, not as he was losing consciousness. 

Wait, he could see something. Something… shiny? And full of power? He forced himself to relive that last part, trying to see what was rolling away as he dropped. A shiny golden long thing, long enough to be a at least a head below his own head, crowned by a couple of snakes and a pair of wings.

A staff.

With Symbol of the Virtues.

Something important he had forgotten from his former life.  
Something he had seen before in many museums, but could barely remember after he exited them. Why? He used to know it so well. It shone above him so many times, at his side too. With coloured lights in the sky.

-Later-

Crowley woke up in the bed he shared with Aziraphale feeling a little bit better, but also weaker than ever. It might have been because of the retching spell this body was forced to endure, but he for some reason didn´t think so. He scanned himself and noticed something holding his power down. A seal. An angelic seal. He went downstairs immediately, prepared to give someone a piece of his mind, before he heard someone talking in the bookshop.

“… should consider yourselves lucky, what you did was reckless in a way even I wouldn´t have dared” Hamaliel´s voice reached his ears, making him stop. “Really, a detox without a certified healer making sure the procedure is correctly made…”

“Thought we could manage” explained the Principality, a little bit ashamed. “It was kind of an emergency. Warlock was dying…”

“I get that, but still. You should have called me” the Virtue said, accepting some tea from the other angel, by the sound of it. “Shouldn´t have done it alone.”

“Well, you managed to do it alone with Kokabiel”

“And it hurt like hell”

“Nonsense” the healer said. “The reason it had such a disastrous consequences was that you upped the dose of holy water by tons without even thinking of the possible side effect. Really, I only upped the dosage of holy water when I was sure what kind of angel he was!!”

“And what does it has to do with this?” asked the angel, curious.

“Well, for starters, they would have different treatments” Hamaliel said, annoyed. “Kokabiel was a member of Michael´s host, a warrior, he didn´t have above the average healing power. Crowley, for another part, was a Virtue, full of it, no matter how much of a novice he was. There was a big possibility that his own power would react badly to the toxin and try to purge it from his system, causing what you already… Crowley!! You are there!!” growling, the demon… or whatever he was now… entered the place. “Tell me, did you remember something?”

“Only the procedures needed to cure braindead in a living, corporeal being” he answered, scratching his head. “Still felt like shit after that.”

“Anything else?”

“I still need to process it, but…” should he tell them or not? Aziraphale smiled at him, encouraging his snake into telling. “Well, it might be nothing, but I remembered a really dusty place full of books and a shiny staff rolling away…” a cup felt to the ground in that moment. “What?”

“Hamaliel, what…”

“The staff, how was it?” Crowley frowned, trying to describe it, but… a notebook was handed to him, miracled by the healer. “Can you draw it?” he did, handing it over when he finished it. “You know what this is? It´s the Staff of Raphael.”

“That relic in Heaven that was said to be the only thing that remains of him?” asked the demon, having heard his partner talking about it sometimes. 

“Yes… but… do you know what this could mean?” the Virtue looked ecstatic, even more than when he found the serpent. “Crowley, I believe you were a witness to Raphael´s disappearance.”

“What?”

“Hamaliel, be realistic” Kokabiel intervened in that moment. “Whatever Raphael was doing, it was probably dangerous. He wouldn´t take a novice with him.”

“Yes, that´s confusing… but it´s also confusing to find a trainee that knows how to perform brain resuscitation. Or that teaches young novices” she started at the redhead. “No, those were things only a High Ranking Officer would know. And you know that too, no, Crowley?” she said, staring at the other healer in the room. “Why did you hide it?”

“I… Raguel lied to Aziraphale once and told him he was a novice. I felt guilty about it”

“Crowley” the Principality said, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Beside not remembering who you are referring to, I wouldn´t put against you whatever he did. He… he might be a part of you, but it was long ago. Whatever he did, it´s not your fault.”

“Thank you, angel”

“How romantic” Hamaliel interrupted them. “For myself, I don´t remember a Raguel, but I chatted with lots of Kokabiel´s former coworkers and they didn´t remember him at all too, so… we probably worked together before and we simply forgot for whatever happened.” she rolled her eyes. “Maybe you will end up remembering. You should remember.”

“Why? I still haven´t changed my mind about becoming an angel again.”

“Snakey, you don´t have another choice now. Your healing power won´t stay contained forever, it´s too great for that. Someday soon it will break the seal and continue the purge of your spirit. You should feel it already, no? Maybe even feathers are turning white now.”

He hasn´t seen his wings, but he could tell she was right. But that was not why she wanted him to recover all his memories, no? She wanted him to find that lost Archangel guy, Raphael… his natural defiance kicked in, making him smirk.

“No way in Hell” was his only answer.

-In Hell-

Asmodeus threw everything in his office around, fury taking hold of him. Everything because of that damn vermin Hastur´s screw up… his best work could be ruined now!! And his life… oh, God, if Lucifer finds out what he did… there wouldn´t be anything remaining of him after the Devil got through his punishment.

“Prince Asmodeus?” one of his creatures asked, trembling in fear as it entered his office.

“Prepare a team, quickly” he ordered, making the demon shake like a leaf. “I need to visit Earth”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Warlock is save, but another Pandora box has just been opened in front of our ineffable pair. Asmodeus too is going to make a move very soon, attracting attention from both sides and revealing some uncomfortable truths some people wanted to keep quiet. Well, hope you liked the chapter. Review!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!! I wrote this while searching for inspiration for the continuation of the Angel and Demon in LA. Hope you like it!!


End file.
